Have read the excellent book by Stephen Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. It is a life long art and science of employing this learning. I fail sometimes and succeed very few times! The personal story will involve the struggle between Parkinson suffering dad and my mom who has severe osteoarthritis and pain because of it. They have the epic battle of trying to understand or misunderstand. Will delve on it some other day.
Communication is the most important skill. Unfortunately we are not taught how to listen. We are lucky if we would have done listening on couple of occasions!
We always feel that how easy it would be if near and dear ones would understand me. Typically it goes like this:
Wish my parents understood me...
Wish my husband/wife understood me...
Wish my friends understood me....
Wish my colleagues understood me....
Wish my children understood me...
Solution:
Excerpt: "Because you so often listen autobiographically, you tend to respond in one of four ways:
Communication is the most important skill. Unfortunately we are not taught how to listen. We are lucky if we would have done listening on couple of occasions!
We always feel that how easy it would be if near and dear ones would understand me. Typically it goes like this:
Wish my parents understood me...
Wish my husband/wife understood me...
Wish my friends understood me....
Wish my colleagues understood me....
Wish my children understood me...
Solution:
Excerpt: "Because you so often listen autobiographically, you tend to respond in one of four ways:
| Evaluating: | You judge and then either agree or disagree. |
| Probing: | You ask questions from your own frame of reference. |
| Advising: | You give counsel, advice, and solutions to problems. |
| Interpreting: | You analyze others' motives and behaviors based on your own experiences."
Reference: 1. https://www.stephencovey.com/7habits/7habits-habit5.php
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Habits #4 & #5 from Alwyn Lau
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